Too Real

I might have caught you off guard, 

when you were just playfully tossing 

"I love yous" and "marry mes" 

to strangers online. 

But there I was 

— perhaps too naive, 

 too trusting, 

 too full of hope for my own good. 

I said “I love you too” 

with every fiber of my being, 

 with every beat of my heart. 

 God be my witness. 

Maybe you were never ready to get real, 

As you'd like to think

Or as you said you were. 

But I was. I was real. 

 

Maybe even too real for you. 

 I cared — deeply. 

 I saw you — as you showed yourself. 

Or maybe… 

Was it just performance? 

I’ll never know. 

And that’s okay. 

It’s okay not to know. 

It’s okay to hurt. 

It’s okay to cry. 

It’s okay that I loved deeply 

and still had to let go. 

Not because I was afraid of love. 

But because I didn’t feel safe 

Or secure in the kind of love you gave. 

I wasn’t asking for perfection. 

That’s overrated. 

I wanted presence.

I was looking for something real 

— because I was real. 

And I always will be.